Impermanence

All things are impermanent which is a difficult as a human being to accept and even grasp. We spend a great deal of time stressing over virtually everything when we actually need not given it is gone as quick as it arrived.

We have entered a new phase in training and this concept or should I say reality will be so important to grasp as I move through learning. The whole battle of feeling that we are not moving forward and almost stepping back is an illustration that nothing is permanent. The block or form that was executed can be executed a million times in succession and no two will be exactly the same. Each form completed time and time again will be different almost with as many infinite possibilities like a snowflake. Mastery is not an end but it is a path.

For me this connection is a powerful one, it goes back to a thought I had some time ago about being in the moment. Recognizing that every moment is different will allow one to be clear of expectation, free of measure, free of ego and yet in the end full of self.

I think it may be in recognition of impermanence that one can begin to accept that likely you will never be done. I had that feeling today at training when we were provided a stripe on our belts to signify that we had passed the Basic Techniques portion of our testing. All week I have been feeling like I am back at the beginning and yet I passed a stage. I felt somewhat like I am not there.

But the reality is I am not the same person I was when I got my last belt I am different, I am different than I was this morning. It is my ego that has dictated what it is that I judge myself to be. It is my ego that will get in the way of my moving forward. This is not about the pursuit of the perfect roundhouse kick. It is not about a belt but interestingly enough it is about the moments in the pursuit. This is about getting beyond self and about accepting impermanence.

Pink Floyd came to mind as I was writing.

"Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day

You fritter and waste the hours in an off hand way

Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town

Waiting for someone or something to show you the way"